"Sizzle Pie with Bill Oakley (LIVE)" is Episode 197 of Doughboys, hosted by Mike Mitchell and Nick Wiger. "Sizzle Pie with Bill Oakley (LIVE)" was released on April 4, 2019.
"Tomorrow... (with @thatbilloakley)" - @doughboyspod
Synopsis[]
Writer and producer Bill Oakley (Disenchantment, The Simpsons) returns to the show for a review of Portland-native pizza chain Sizzle Pie. Plus, a live edition of The Wiger Challenge.
Recorded live at Revolution Hall in Portland, Oregon.
Nick's intro[]
"Generals gathered in their masses / Just like witches at black masses / Evil minds that plot destruction / Sorcerer of death's construction"
Black Sabbath "War Pigs"
These lyrics are excerpted from the 1970s song, "War Pigs" by Black Sabbath.
The U.K. act fronted by Ozzy Osbourne, a soaring vocalist and shock performance artist akin to a TV-14 GG Allin, was arguably the most groundbreaking band in heavy metal. Incorporating imagery associated with witchcraft, the occult, and even Satanism into their lyrics and aesthetic, Sabbath sparked a hellfire of controversy about what critics called "devil music."
The band's actual messaging was often strikingly leftist; another verse in "War Pigs" reads "Politicians hide themselves away / they only started the war / why should they go out to fight? / they leave that role to the poor."
So one might infer the media's focus on devilry was a politically convenient way to shield youths from the unwelcome ideology of anti-imperialism. But their many controversies only amplified their already amplified music and Black Sabbath would influence genre stalwarts like Iron Maiden, Guns 'N Roses, and Metallica, whose founder James Hetfield once said, "Sabbath got me started on all that evil-sounding shit."
And, as with all music once deemed too dangerous, from the Baroque compositions of J.S. Bach to the big-band swing of the Duke Ellington Orchestra, as its fans aged and settled down, heavy metal eventually became accessible, sanitized, and even quaint. Ozzy Osborne morphed into the doddering centerpiece of an MTV reality show based around his domestic life. Metallica cut their hair, shopped at Armani, and testified before Congress to decry the difficulty of monetizing downloadable music.
And in 2011, in Portland, Oregon, the city that spawned esteemed metal bands like Agalloch, Red Fang, and Toxic Holocaust, avid metalheads Mikey McKennedy and Matt Jacobson used the once-taboo genre as the theming for a restaurant built around their other passion: pizza.
Admitted novices to the kitchen, in an interview with The Oregonian, Jacobson conceded "I've never made pizza before in my life," the duo ably summoned a kitchen staff to execute their vision of a Rip City slice-and-salad joint. Powered by loaded pizzas with metal-influenced names like Napalm Breath and Buffalo 666, they parlayed their first location located in an area once colorfully dubbed Heroin Alley into their current tally of eight restaurants across greater Portland. And though an attempt to establish outposts in the pizza-elitist enclave of Brooklyn failed, they have successfully expanded to Eugene, Reno, and Seattle, home of the decidedly un-metal Niles and Frasier Crane.
As for McKennedy and Jacobson's philosophy, it can be found in the company's slogan, which could be a Weird Al take on Sabbath: "death to false pizza."
This week on Doughboys: Sizzle Pie.
Fork rating[]
| guest / host | ordered | rating |
|---|---|---|
| Nick Wiger | Iced Tea | 3.25 forks |
| Mike Mitchell | - | 3.5 forks |
| Bill Oakley | - | 3.75 forks |
| shared slices |
|
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| shared full pizzas |
|
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| shared |
|
If you want to see what these named pizzas actually consist of, click here for the Sizzle Pie menu.
The Wiger Challenge[]
Stumptown Coconut Cream & Suger Coffee
In the Wiger Challenge, Nick presents Mitch and the guest a mystery beverage, and they try to guess what it is. The closest guess is declared the winner and receives the remainder of the drink.
For this episode, the drink was a Stumptown Coconut Creme & Sugar Cold Brew Coffee.
| guest / host | guess | result |
|---|---|---|
| Mike Mitchell | Stumptown cinnamon chocolate latte | winner! |
| Bill Oakley | Dunkin' Donuts gingerbread house drink |
Roast Spoonman[]
| “ | The Mayor of Rip City ("Rip" being the sound it makes whenever he tries on a new pair of pants) |
” |
–Thomas S. | ||
Mount Foodmore of Donuts 🍩[]
An audience member (Pasha) asked them for their donut rankings.
| guest / host | 🍩 | 🍩 | 🍩 | 🍩 |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Nick Wiger | maple bar | glazed | chocolate frosted | buttermilk bar |
| Mike Mitchell | chocolate frosted | jelly | chocolate cruller | Dunkin' Donuts Munchkins |
| Bill Oakley | Homer Simpson's pink donut | - | - | - |
| Pasha | apple fritter | maple bar | old-fashioned | jelly |
Quotes[]
| “ | Fuck you for making so much free content for us! | ” |
–Nick to Robert Persinger, The Drop King (hey!) | ||
| “ | I'm never in the mood to rock and roll while I'm stuffing a piece of pizza in my face. It depresses me. | ” |
–Mike Mitchell on rock-themed restaurants | ||
| “ | On the plane up here... the woman across the aisle from me says "Excuse me, why do you keep looking at Sizzle Pie? That place is garbage." Very very anti-Sizzle Pie. And then she ended up being a chef, who has a restaurant of some reknown up here that I will not name. We talked a little bit, I had to explain why I was going up to Portland to eat at this restaurant that she did not like. So I eventually said, "Yea we have this podcast..." and then she said "Let me know what the name of the podcast is, so I can not listen to it." | ” |
–Nick Wiger getting slammed by an airplane passenger | ||
| “ | I told my Dad I'd make him proud. | ” |
–Mike Mitchell, after the return of Hike Mitchell | ||
#hashtags[]
- #SizzlePieGuyorGirlorPerson vs. #FizzlePie
The Live Feedbag[]
| “ | I'm the hot, young single mom who... my daughter is in LOVE with you, Nick Wiger, and is convinced she is going to be your bride at some point.
My question is: Sizzle Pie reminds me of Ninja Turtle pizza because it's flat and long and cheese is dripping off of it. Which Ninja Turtle do you identify as? And, a quick aside, I think Mike Mitchell is the most handsome and nice man in the universe. |
” |
–Chelsea | ||
| “ | So I've been on a major cereal binge lately with CT Crunch and Fruity Pebble Bites, so I was wondering what you guys' favorite cereal was as kids and your favorite cereal as adults? | ” |
–Evan | ||
| “ | As mentioned earlier in the show, Portland is known as a donut town between Blue Star and Voodoo and the others. I want to know your Mount Foodmore of donuts. | ” |
–Pasha, (see above) | ||
| “ | As somebody who also spills on themselves a lot, what's the worst thing you've ever spilled on yourself? | ” |
–Sam | ||
| “ | So how are you guys' choosing your tour date restaurants because I'm very curious... you got the poutine up in Canada, the pastrami down in San Diego... what's making you choose these restaurants? I don't agree with Sizzle Pie. | ” |
–some guy | ||
| “ | I once had an overnight job and they would make me food to eat every night. I would not sleep well. When I did that, I once one time got salad. In the twilight of not-sleeping, I put it in the microwave. And I LOVED IT, BABY! Also real quick question: Mitch and Nick, what do Hick Wiger and Hike Mitchell have to say about Portland? |
” |
–Mauricio | ||
| “ | In the history of Doughboys, there's never been a zero fork rating given for a restaurant. So two part quick question: what would it take for the Doughboys to give a restaurant zero forks? (Excepting money, because the Doughboys can't be bought.) And second, do you have any memorable zero fork restaurant memories? | ” |
–Les | ||
| “ | Hi guys. I have one question for each of you. Nick Mitchell, assuming you could not auto-fellate yourself, would you rather fuck a toaster or a refrigerator? Mike Wiger, during the first episode of this year, Paquito Mas with Dan Goo, minute 73, you remarked that hot dishes should not be called cake. Mike Wiger, are you saying you like cold pancakes? |
” |
–Ace of Spades Guy | ||
Related Episodes[]
| Bill Oakley episodes |
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Photos (via @doughboyspod)[]
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