Doughboys Wikia
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"Corner Bakery with Marques Ray" is Episode 383 of Doughboys, hosted by Nick Wiger and Mike Mitchell. "Corner Bakery with Marques Ray" was released on February 2, 2023.

Cornerbakerytweet

"Tomorrow… with Marques Ray" - @doughboyspod

Synopsis[]

Marques Ray (Curb Your Enthusiasm, Superstore, Brewster High) joins the 'boys to discuss ice cream flavors, on-set snacks, and bidets before a review of Corner Bakery. Plus, a brand new segment, Chew Truths, and a Fry.

Nick's intro[]

Baby boomers: this generation of Americans began spawning after the cessation of World War II in 1946, as returning GIs got to the busy work of railing their wives.

Boomers

Baby boomers

And while boomers themselves catch a lot of the blame for contemporary America’s ecologically ruined, economically bifurcated dystopia, it was their equally shitty parents, the so-called “greatest generation” as fawningly dubbed by journalist Tom Brokaw, that set the wheels in motion, as the year 1946 birthed not just the first wave of Karens, but the modern idea of private equity — giant pools of money managed by psychopath capitalists that exist only to overtake businesses and extract as much profit as possible, like money-milking Metroids.

This predatory practice has come to impact every sector of the American economy — including food, most famously in the hostile takeover of RJR Nabisco in the 1980s, chronicled in the book and film, Barbarians at the Gate. And so naturally, many beloved chain restaurants these days are controlled by private-equity firms: Argonne Capital owns IHOP and Applebee’s; Golden Gate Capital oversees CPK and Red Lobster, and in 2020, Roark Capital Group (owner of Arby’s and Jimmy John’s) transferred ownership of a breakfast- and lunch-focused sit-down chain to Rohan Group (owner of Boston Market).

This cafe was originally founded, fittingly, on a corner in Chicago in 1991, and had an eager patronage from the office lunch set, as well as people looking for a spot to kill time and sip coffee, eventually expanding to nearly 200 locations nationwide. Around the turn of the millennium, its founding owner, the punnily named Lettuce Entertain You, began a series of sales that saw the company changing hands a half-dozen times until the hot potato landed with its current stewardship.

So while the name may evoke a mom-and-pop local baker of postwar Main Street USA, its corporate ownership reflects the more important postwar reality: an anonymous, unaccountable glob of money management.

This week on Doughboys… Corner Bakery Cafe.

Fork rating[]

guest / host ordered rating
Nick Wiger
  • Peach Arnold Palmer
  • Cheddar Broccoli Soup
  • Family Meal
    • Turkey Avocado Cobb Salad (no bacon)
    • Chopped Salad [Natalie's Order]
    • Chicken Pomodori Panini
    • Pesto Cavatappi
  • Peach Baby Bundt Cake
  • Maple Pecan Bar
  • Six Cookies (Chocolate Chip and Monster)
4 forks
Mike Mitchell
  • Strawberry Lemonade
  • Chicken Pomodori Panini
  • Side Salad (Italian Dressing)
3.5 forks
Marques Ray
  • Peach Lemonade
  • Rustic Italian Panini
4.5 forks
Mitch and Marques shared
  • Mac & Cheese
  • Chicken Carbonara
  • Loaded Baked Potato Soup
  • Roasted Tomato Basil Soup
  • Chocolate Baby Bundt Cake
  • Monster Cookie
  • English Toffee Cookie

Spoonman's Bite of the Night went to both the Mac & Cheese and the Chicken Carbonara.

Chew Truths and a Fry[]

In this debut of a new quiz segment, Nick gives two truths and a lie about a chain, and Mitch and the guests try to figure out the lie.

statements Mike Mitchell Marques Ray the lie score (MM-MR)
Waffle House
  • a. the wiki page for the CEO states he eats three waffles every morning
  • b. Waffle House has a record label
  • c. if you stacked all their sausages made in a day, it would be taller than the Burj Khalifa
a - a 1 - 0
McDonald's
  • a. Kroc gave 20% of his charitable donations to Satan's Church
  • b. a new McDonald's opens every 14.5 minutes
  • c. McDonald's has a special gold card that Rob Lowe, Warren Buffett, Bill Gates have
c a b 1 - 0
Denny's
  • a. you can get married at the Denny's in Las Vegas
  • b. Denny's has a web series with Chris Pratt and Sarah Silverman
  • c. FEMA uses Denny's to measure natural disasters
c b c 2 - 0
IHOP
  • a. originally meant 'International House of Potatoes'
  • b. owns Applebee's
  • c. sued International House of Prayer for trademark infringement
a - a 3 - 0
Carl's Jr./Hardee's
  • a. Carl Karcher was accused of insider trading
  • b. Carl Karcher has 86 grandchildren
  • c. in 2006, Carl's Jr. sold a $6000 combo meal
c a b 3 - 0
Olive Garden
  • a. Post Malone owns the slogan 'when you're here, you're family'
  • b. took away Sean Hannity's lifetime pasta pass
  • c. advertises that their managers go to a school in Tuscany but there isn't one
a b b 3 - 1
Subway
  • a. in 1999, 32 customers got Hepatitis B via two Subways
  • b. you get free Subway when it rains in Los Angeles
  • c. the 'BMT' originally named after the Brooklyn Manhattan Transit
b a a 3 - 2
Papa John's
  • a. Pizza Hut sued them over the slogan 'better ingredients, better pizza'
  • b. Papa John was on Epstein's flight log in 2016
  • c. Papa John founded it in a broom closet
b a b 4 - 2

Mitch wins!

Roast Spoonman[]

Mitchandpratt

Chris Pratt and Crisp Bratt

Crisp Bratt

–Andy P.

Quotes[]

If you were a Die Hard villain, you'd die immediately.

–Mike Mitchell to Nick

My wardrobe fitting was in the same tank they keep Bruce the Shark in.

–Mitch re: working at Universal

Nick: I got chocolate on my trousers. I accidentally sat on the microphone.

Mitch: I don't know how you do an unfunny Mr. Bean.

–The Doughboys

The Feedbag[]

If you could create your own mixed nuts combo, what would it be?

–Cory

guest / host mixed nuts combo
Nick Wiger almonds, pistachios, Macademia, pecans, walnuts
Mike Mitchell 100% peanuts (with different flavors/seasonings)
Marques Roy walnuts, peanuts, Macademia

Photos[]

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